Reflections on "pointing a child in the right direction" after spending time with my granddaughter

“Point your kids in the right direction - when they're old they won't be lost.” Proverbs 22:6 (The Message) … or, as most of us know it, “Raise up a child …

Yesterday was an “Ava and Pappa Day”. One day on or near the 25th of the month each month my granddaughter and I spend the day together doing something special. It is her Love Gift from Pappa.

Love Gifts are a long-standing Christmas tradition in the Martin household, but that is another story for another time.

Yesterday we went to Mote Marine and Aquarium in Sarasota to look at, in her words, “The little tiny, tiny sea horses and the crabs that go snap-snap.”

Ava was down on her hands and knees looking at an eel resting among the rocks when she got literally pushed aside by a group of children from a church kindergarten. I know that they were from a church because of their bright blue T-shirts that declared which church, etc.

Ava turned to me and said, “They weren’t nice. They didn’t even say excuse me.” When we turned to leave two of the group’s leaders were standing watching over the students. I simply said, in passing, that their children’s behavior was not very polite to which the adults responded with, “Well, after all they are only children!” “But,” I shared, “if they don’t learn now good manners, when?” and I pointed out the observation that my 30-month old granddaughter made.

“Point a child in the right direction …”

I’m very proud of the way Ava’s parents are raising her. When we have been out individuals have shared how polite she is. There are a lot of pleases, thank yous and excuse mes. They have done a marvelous job. Is she perfect … well, only in our eyes, but still …

Later that day, over lunch at one of her favorite places … Burger King (it’s the only hamburger that she will eat) … there was another family consisting of a mother and three children, one about Ava’s age. The one Ava’s age was very vocal and very loud. As they were leaving Ava leaned into me and said, “He doesn’t know that he has an inside voice.”

“Point a child in the right direction …”

Over the past month we have been traveling and eating out a lot. On more than one occasion there have been families with young children in the restaurants. These children simply ran around, made a glorious mess on the table, chairs and floor and made it very hard to speak because of their loud behavior.

In at least one situation the parents constantly asked the children to stop, but then continued to sit there and have their “adult” conversations as their children continued to disrupt the dinning room.

“Point a child in the right direction …”

Receiving children into our homes and into our hearts is a heavy responsibility. The wisdom of God is seen in that he gives to young people these children to be directed and shaped. It is a full-time job and takes an incredible amount of energy. And, if God is gracious, then he permits the influence and reinforcement of one or more grandparent, as well as aunts and uncles.

A new favorite quote is: “I realize then that we never have children, we receive them. And sometimes it’s not for quite as long as we would have expected or hoped. But it is still far better than never having had those children at all.” (page 395, “My Sister’s Keeper” by Jodi Picoult)

We should never take our responsibility of directing the path of the little minds, personalities, and behavior lightly. Nor should we, as the leaders of that group at Mote Marine suggested, dismiss bad behavior as them “just being children.”

“Point a child in the right direction …”