Monday, March 28, 2011

A conversation remembered and a reflection on the importance of family

It was just a passing conversation in a grocery store checkout line, but it was a conversation that has stayed with me over the many years. Often I find myself reflecting on the simple words shared, words that took root in my spirit.

The day had started early. It usually did, but today was kind of busy. I needed to get to the church office early in order to have on the desk of the secretary the necessary information for Sunday’s bulletin. It was two days late. She was very patient. It helped that she was a “preacher’s wife” and understood the demands on a pastor’s time and energy.

There were two meetings and several phone calls concerning the proposed building program and capital funds campaign fast approaching. The phone calls were meant to put out some fires. The congregation was divided between a new sanctuary and more Sunday school rooms. Hopefully they would be short and pleasant phone calls.

And, then a quick sandwich for lunch and off to make many hospital calls. I believe there was five different hospitals stretched from Hudson all the way down to St. Petersburg … which meant a lot of stop-and-go driving along U.S. 19. It was going to be a long, long afternoon … and I was starting much later that I had hoped.

To make it worse, it was a hot summer day. Temperature in the high 90s and I was wearing the expected suit and tie. After all that is what preachers wore, especially if a hospital visits were on the agenda.

The day was wrapping up. I had one more stop to make before getting back home and out of my now wet suit. Margaret had asked me to stop by the store to pick up something that she needed for supper. And, so there I stood, with my one item in my hand. A lady stood in front of me with her two items and the conversation took place.

“Sir, if that is all you have, you can go ahead of me.”

“No, I’m okay, but thanks anyway.”

“You look important and seem to be in a hurry. Why don’t you just go on ahead?”
(She was correct about being in a hurry … even when I wasn’t I walked fast, drove fast and eat fast … always in a hurry to get to some place else.)

“No, that is quite alright. I need to slow down anyway after the day I have had. I’m kind of enjoying just standing here and doing nothing.”

“Do you have a family?”

“Yes, I do. A wife and two daughters.”

“Oh, my, you really do need to go ahead of me so you can get home to be with your family. I’m by myself now and all I have waiting for me is my cat.”

There was a long pause in our conversation and then she spoke again.

“Never be in such a hurry that you don’t have time for your family. Before too long those daughters are going to be gone living in another town. And, it is unfortunate, but your wife will pass away before you know it and you will be left alone with just a cat.”

“Were you married long?”

“54 years, but it wasn’t long enough. He passed away just three months ago. I really would have liked to have another day or two with him, but now it is just the cat … his cat.”

I went ahead of her, checked out, gave her a hug and promised that I would try to slow down and appreciate my family while they were still with me. I have slowed down, not sure if it is just old age or a conscious effort on my part. I don’t walk as fast I use to nor do I drive as fast as I use to … but I still eat too fast. And family? They are nearby and we get together often. There is a dog, lives with oldest daughter now. There won’t ever be a cat. But, I think of that sweet elderly lady in the Publix checkout lane who only had “just a cat” to go home to and try to appreciate everyday as a gift of grace with those who are most important.

Quote for today: Rudyard Kipling once wrote about families, "all of us are we--and everyone else is they." A family shares things like dreams, hopes, possessions, memories, smiles, frowns, and gladness...A family is a clan held together with the glue of love and the cement of mutual respect. A family is shelter from the storm, a friendly port when the waves of life become too wild. No person is ever alone who is a member of a family. ~Fingertip Facts.

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